PinnedConfessions of an Autistic Female PastorLike it wasn’t already weird enough being a woman in ministry. — Dear Church, I have a confession to make. Seems God put me here on a divinely complex “secret shopper” mission. Let me explain. I’ve often wondered what exactly He had in mind when He took this unwanted white-trash kid from a background of total dysfunction and put me in charge…Autism6 min read
PinnedThink You’re Alone? The Truth in a Crowd of 1-in-4sNormalizing the conversation around mental health and neurodiversity. — I have a confession to make. This might sound stupid to some of you. I’ve certainly been made fun of and harassed about it by enough people. So it’s something I’ve carried in quiet and in embarrassment for most of my life. It’s something I’ve tried to cover up, suppress…Autism14 min read
PinnedDepression and Christianity Can CoexistOne bleak November night on the couch, back in 2016, I quietly told my husband, “It looks like I’m supposed to start writing again, but I’m feeling stuck and overwhelmed, and I don’t know where to start.” With the shrewd eye of a person who knows me best, he looked…Depression11 min read
Published in Koinonia·Apr 30My Prayers are Not Very PopularWhich tells me they’re the prayers I need to pray — Father, forgive us, for we know exactly what we do. Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on us — sinners. Merciful Savior, look what we’ve done — and save us. In one way or another, we’ve all been complacent or complicit. Maker of all heaven and earth, lift…Christianity6 min read
Mar 30I’d Like to Come Out as Autistic at Work, But it’s Hard to ExplainBecause I’ve been so programmed into internalized ableism myself that when I think about saying some of these things out loud to my direct supervisor, for instance, even I think I sound weird. I mean, I could probably get through some of the more technical attributes, like explaining the concept…Autism8 min read
Mar 23The #1 Way I Make Money on Medium is by Reading Other WritersSo I’m not exactly young, in internet years. (Kinda like dog years, except you lose 10 years of relevance for every year you live past age 35.) I mean, Twitter is 16 years old, and I passed my 13-year Twitterversary last month. Yikes. Remember when 2007 was called “The Year…Writing5 min read
Published in Koinonia·Feb 14When You Feel Cut Off, You’re Part of the WholeIf we’re going to connect, someone has to go first — Early in the COVID-19 crisis, as communities reeled from sudden shutdowns and social distancing, I saw a meme I can’t forget. It said, “Welcome, extroverts, to the anxiety introverts experience all the time.” Read that again. Seems we’re all feeling out of place — #alonetogether, anyone? Implications of avoiding contact…Christianity3 min read
Feb 14You Do Not Have Permission to Make Fun of My HusbandStanding up for marriage instead of tearing it down… — “She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.” (Proverbs 31:12) See if you can spot what’s wrong in this exchange: one Sunday morning, in the foyer at church, I ran into an acquaintance from back in high school. …Marriage8 min read
Published in Koinonia·Feb 3Blessed Are the Gritty, Hard-Working PeacemakersTo ‘make’ peace doesn’t make for a ‘peaceful’ life — “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God…” (Matthew 5:9, NIV) What does it mean to “make” peace? To make means to create something where it wasn’t before. Peacemaking means actively manifesting—bringing peace to situations that are not peaceful otherwise. Christians have a lot of opportunities…Christianity3 min read
Published in The Memoirist·Feb 3Don’t Get Engaged on Valentine’s DayTW: substance abuse, suicidal gestures, self-harm. — It happens in February. It’s 2007. It starts just like any other blackout. One minute, we’re wrapped up on the couch together, laughing and sharing a bottle of Jack Daniels, the tears still wet on my face. We’re celebrating. He’s back again. I’ve forgiven him again. …The Memoirist10 min read
